May 2011

Dear Blog fans… I am having many problems (but no stress) with posting the blog today and I don’t know how to fix things… so below is what I was able to salvage…my apologies.

• Stress Tip For The Day:

Are there good addictions? Some people see exercise as being a good addiction, but there are others who say that addictions of any kind are an attempt, consciously, more likely unconsciously, of avoidance. Still others suggest that addictions of any kind are an attempt to fill a spiritual vacuum. Regarding addictions, there is no separation between mind, body, spirit and emotions. Today it’s time to take an honest look at yourself and your behaviors (all of them). If you are not sure about any potential addictions, try doing “without” for a few days and see where truth lies. If you are still not sure, ask a close friend. Often what we fail to see in ourselves is quite obvious to others. Finally, as the saying goes, everything is moderation.

• Links/Books Worth Noting:

The topic of addictions is vast and no blog can begin to address it. But there are lots of books, links and resources of interest.. Below are a
few:

When Society Becomes and Addict, Anne Wilson Schaef

Codependent No More, Melodie Beattie

http://addictionrecoverybasics.com/

• Quote for the Day:

“Every form of addiction is bad, no matter whether it be a narcotic, alcohol, morphine or idealism.”— Carl G. Jung

• Photo of the Day:

Today’s photo is a beach scene on the island of Kauai. Enjoy!

Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D.
is an internationally renowned expert in the fields of stress
management, mind-body-spirit healing and stress and human spirituality.
He is the author of over 10 books including the bestsellers, Stand
Like Mountain, Flow Like Water, Stressed Is Desserts Spelled Backward,
The Art of Calm, Quiet Mind, Fearless Heart and Managing Stress (6E). He can be reached through his website:www.brianlukeseaward.net

© Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D.

Several years ago I taught a graduate course called behavioral medicine where we focused a fair amount of attention on the addiction process. As it turns out, there are two kinds of addictions: Chemical addictions (such as drugs and alcohol) and process addictions, including gambling, eating, sex, money and shopping, even people (this is called co-dependency). One book I often quoted from that time from was by Anne Wilson Schaef. The book was called When Society Becomes and Addict. Her premise was that addiction is an inherent part of the human condition—tied directly to the ego’s need to be satisfied. Where there is ego/control issues, there is stress. According to her (and others) we are all addicts of some kind. For several years television watching was the number addiction, and of course alcoholism. Experts suggest today that addictions to technology tops the list (e.g. cell phones, internet, etc.). The term today is “screen addictions, ” and the problem is rampant. Regardless of the addictive behavior, it becomes problematic; stressful to everyone near and far, when there is denial about the addiction and refusal to get help. Addictions are some of our biggest health problems today and where there is an addiction, there is stress.

• Stress Tip For The Day:

Are there good addictions? Some people see exercise as being a good addiction, but there are others who say that addictions of any kind are an attempt, consciously, more likely unconsciously, of avoidance. Still others suggest that addictions of any kind are an attempt to fill a spiritual vacuum. Regarding addictions, there is no separation between mind, body, spirit and emotions. Today it’s time to take an honest look at yourself and your behaviors (all of them). If you are not sure about any potential addictions, try doing “without” for a few days and see where truth lies. If you are still not sure, ask a close friend. Often what we fail to see in ourselves is quite obvious to others. Finally, as the saying goes, everything is moderation.

• Links/Books Worth Noting:

The topic of addictions is vast and no blog can begin to address it. But there are lots of books, links and resources of interest.. Below are a few:

When Society Becomes and Addict, Anne Wilson Schaef

Codependent No More, Melodie Beattie

http://addictionrecoverybasics.com/

• Quote for the Day:

“Every form of addiction is bad, no matter whether it be a narcotic, alcohol, morphine or idealism.”

— Carl G. Jung

• Photo of the Day:

Today’s photo is a beach scene on the island of Kauai. Enjoy!

Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D. is an internationally renowned expert in the fields of stress management, mind-body-spirit healing and stress and human spirituality. He is the author of over 10 books including the bestsellers, Stand Like Mountain, Flow Like Water, Stressed Is Desserts Spelled Backward, The Art of Calm, Quiet Mind, Fearless Heart and Managing Stress (6E). He can be reached through his website:www.brianlukeseaward.net

© Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D.

It’s fear that causes us to lie. Simply stated, the ego feels insecure about the course of our actions (often motivated by fear). So… to avoid embarrassment, we bend the truth, tell a white lie, or in some cases a whopper! Lies may see like a way to avoid the pain of embarrassment, but it doesn’t take long to see the foundations of trust, either in a friendship or working relationship crumble, then disintegrate! Once trust is violated, it’s hard to ever get that back. Ironically, it’s
stress that can cause one to lie, and it is stress that becomes compounded when one perpetuates the lie(s). The weight of a lie can be a heavy burden. Living with the incongruency of a falsehood tears at the heart. This, in turn, affects (taints) all other behavior. Many people have made the news with their whopper lies including Martha Stewart, Barry Bonds, Arnold Schwarzenegger. Things are not looking good for Lance Armstrong, either. But are we any different, really?
Taking the high road means to walk the path of integrity, domesticating the ego to be our bodyguard, not the CEO of our lives. Telling the truth is the noble course of action.

• Stress Tip For The Day:
Make a habit to observe your thoughts today (and every day). When you catch a fear-based lie passing through your lips (preferably before), stop, ponder and explain your fear then correct your communication and ask for forgiveness. Making peace with yourself at the earliest possible moment is one of the surest ways to return to inner peace.

• Links/Books Worth Noting:
I would like to recommend a really good book on forgiveness. It’s by Fred Luskin (who does research on forgiveness out of Stanford University), and it’s called Forgive for Good.

• Quote for the Day:
“Tell the truth… it’s easier to remember!” — Mark Twain

• Photo of the Day:
It will be quite sad if we learn that Lance Armstrong fell under the spell of fear in an effort to win the Tour de France. Time will tell and I wish him well. This photo was taken in Colorado at one of our many cycling races. Enjoy!

Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D. is an internationally renowned expert in the fields of stress management, mind-body-spirit healing and stress and human spirituality. He is the author of over 10 books including the bestsellers, Stand Like Mountain, Flow Like Water, Stressed Is Desserts Spelled Backward, The Art of Calm, Quiet Mind, Fearless Heart and Managing Stress (6E). He can be reached through his website:www.brianlukeseaward.net

© Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D.

One of the tenants of psychology is the concept called the Yerkes-Dodson Law or curve. With performance on the bottom and arousal on the left, the graph showed that arousal can and will increase performance to a point (and this point differs from person to person). Then performance decreases, sometimes dramatically. Arousal is another word for stress. It’s also another word for sensory stimulation. Similarly, performance can also be described as health. So another interpretation of the Yerkes-Dodson curve suggests that to a point, stress (sensory stimulation) is good, but past that point, all hell breaks loose. I first heard of this in my work with Olympic athletes, but the concept applies to anyone.

We are living is times of sensory bombardment. While many people call this the “information age,” others have nicked-named it the “marketing age,” where not blank space, real, cyber or otherwise, is left blank. Bits and bytes of information are flying everywhere. Signs of information overload include a shortened attention span, irritability, poor memory, even poor reaction time. Because there is no separation between mind and body, when these conditions persist, the next sign is burnout, followed by some aspect of health that becomes compromised. The key in psychological terms is this: Know your threshold and don’t go beyond it.

• Stress Tip For The Day:
What is your threshold for sensory stimulation? People under the age of 20 seem to have an unquenchable thirst for sensory stimulation. Conversely, the elderly do best when they stick to a routine, perhaps minimizing/filtering what comes in . Experts in the field of brain physiology with an eye on Alzheimer’s suggest that the brain needs new stimulation (e.g., a new language, Sudoku, cross word puzzles, etc.) Experts in the field of stress management remind us of the importance of meditation as a means to stabilize, if not master, this threshold of excitement. Balance is the key. Knowing your excitement threshold is like knowing your checking account balance. What is your threshold for sensory stimulation? What do you do to master it? If you don’t have a practice of meditation, it is never too late to get started with it.

• Links/Books Worth Noting:
If you haven’t read the Newsweek article on Information Overstimulation, here is the link:
http://www.newsweek.com/2011/02/27/i-can-t-think.html

• Quote for the Day:
“I finally get meditation. It’s like deleting old emails.” — 8th grader at Sunset Middle School, Longmont, CO.

• Photo of the Day:
Today’s photo isn’t a photo at all. It’s a cartoon I had created for my textbook. Enjoy!

Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D. is an internationally renowned expert in the fields of stress management, mind-body-spirit healing and stress and human spirituality. He is the author of over 10 books including the bestsellers, Stand Like Mountain, Flow Like Water, Stressed Is Desserts Spelled Backward, The Art of Calm, Quiet Mind, Fearless Heart and Managing Stress (6E). He can be reached through his website:www.brianlukeseaward.net

© Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D.

Have you ever dreamed of basking under the rays of the Tuscan sun (if you have seen the movie staring Diane Lane, then the answer is YES!) Well…our trip to Ireland last year was so successful that I was asked (many times over) to put together a similar type trip to Tuscany this year. I found one of the best tour companies for small groups like ours and the dates are set: Sept 23-Oct 1^st. We begin in Florence for two nights, then drive to the Tuscany countryside for four nights and end our trip on the Mediterranean Sea near the UNESCO villages of Cinque Terra. It will be a most memorable trip. We have several spots left and would LOVE to have you join us: Great food, awesome sights, and great like-minded people who wish to recalibrate their lifestyles toward optimal health and wellness with great food, morning meditations and some light lectures on various aspects of health and wellbeing (we even have 10 CE’s through the American Holistic Nurses Association. A link below has all the information. So…start packing your bags…

Stress Tip for the Day: Please consider joining us for a most memorable trip to Tuscany, Italy this fall. $3,600 (land package). Call or email for more details.

Links, Books & Movies Worth Noting: This link has all the information you need for our trip:

http://www.brianlukeseaward.net/tuscany.html

Quote for the Day: “We were given: Two hands to hold. Two legs to walk. Two eyes to see. Two ears to listen. But why only one heart? Because the other was given to someone else. For us to find.” —Anonymous

Photo for the Day: A photo of the unique, memorable Tuscan countryside.

Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D. is an internationally renowned expert in the fields of stress management, mind-body-spirit healing and stress and human spirituality. He is the author of over 10 books including the bestsellers, Stand Like Mountain, Flow Like Water, Stressed Is Desserts Spelled Backward, The Art of Calm, Quiet Mind, Fearless Heart and Managing Stress (6E). He can be reached through his website:www.brianlukeseaward.net

© Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D.

Having just returned from Lansing, Michigan where I was invited to make a presentation at Michigan State University on the topic on The Call to Leadership, I felt inspired to share some insights from this presentation. The study of leadership is a study of the psychology of leadership; those qualities and aspects of personality that galvanize the human spirit to new heights of potential. There are some who say we are living in times of a crisis of leadership in all aspects of society. In such times people tend to look back in history and try to identify the best examples of leadership. Examples might include Nelson Mandela, Lewis and Clark, and one of my favorites, Ernest Shakleton. In this search for leadership, people also try to identify what are the best qualities of dynamic leadership including, but not limited to integrity, courage, honesty, inspiration, vision, and humility. The pitfalls of leadership are also examined and there tends to be no short list of qualities that are noticed. No matter how many shortcomings are listed, it is fair to say that they begin with stress in the form of arrogance coupled with fear” Simple stated, stress makes for bad leadership. Servant leadership is a term you might start listening for these days; a leader who works directly with people as opposed to remaining perched on the top. Leading from behind is also an expression you might hear more of. It speaks of unity building, consensus building and bringing people together rather than ruling by decree. Nelson Mandela referred to the bloodless transition out of Apartheid as leading from behind.

Stress Tip for the Day: How would you rate your leadership skills? Luminaries in many fields remind us that each of us is a leader, and at this time, this chapter of humanity, each of us needs to step up to the plate and demonstrate the epitome of dynamic leadership. This includes, but is not limited to, parenting skills, neighborhood meetings, environmental behaviors, driving, you name it.

Links, Books & Movies Worth Noting Many books have been written on the topic of leadership, but perhaps some of the best book are those autobiographies from those who have lead by example. For this reason I would like to recommend the following books:

South by Sir Ernest Shackleton

Reason for Hope by Jane Goodall

Long Walk to Freedom by Nelson Mandela

Quote for the Day: Normally I only have one quote, but this topic has no shortage of quotes from people who have been there: Enjoy!

“A leader should have an ability to see beyond the present problem”— Norman Vincent Peale

“Innovation distinguishes between a leader and a follower.” ~Steve Jobs

“In matters of style, swim with the current. In matters of principle, stand like a rock.” —Thomas. Jefferson

“The only real training for leadership is leadership.” —Antony Jay

“Example is not the main thing in influencing others, it is the only thing.”—Albert Schweitzer

“Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man’s character, give him power.” —Abraham Lincoln

“Leadership and learning are indispensable to each other.” –John Fitzgerald Kennedy

“The manager asks how and when; the leader asks what and why.” —Warren Bennis

Photo for the Day: A photo of several Canada geese (these guys take turns leading). Enjoy!

Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D. is an internationally renowned expert in the fields of stress management, mind-body-spirit healing and stress and human spirituality. He is the author of over 10 books including the bestsellers, Stand Like Mountain, Flow Like Water, Stressed Is Desserts Spelled Backward, The Art of Calm, Quiet Mind, Fearless Heart and Managing Stress (6E). He can be reached through his website:www.brianlukeseaward.net

© Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D.