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Many cultures around the world speak of the body as a temple, a sacred place in which we inhabit. This universal message speaks to the inherent connection between body and spirit, for the wisdom keepers the world over remind us that within this temple resides the soul. From what we eat, even what we wear to how we exercise, and what ideas we fill our head all these constitute care for this temple. Fasting was and still is encouraged, not as a means to lose weight, but as a way to cleanse the temple. Likewise meditation is a means to fast the mind’s mental chitter-chatter, produced by the ego. The ego too, can make a mess of the temple. For millennia, wisdom keepers have reminded us to not only honor our bodies, but to honor the temple within; to honor the body-spirit connection. And true to form, this message is often unheeded today. Nutrition habits are abysmal. Exercises habits are not much better. Everywhere on the planet ego’s have run amuck. Simple stated, the state of the body temple is not only stressed, it’s a mess! To quote your mother, “Clean your room!”

Stress Tip for The Day:
What is your relationship with your body? Do you view it as a temple… or a convenient store? Are you what you eat? Do you feed your head with negative news and junk food entertainment? Does your temple need a good sweeping with a broom (perhaps a shovel)? Consider the concept of the fast today, but not as missing calories or news content, but as a way to cleanse the temple of your body-mind. In doing so, take comfort in the emptiness where the divine resides within. Honor your temple!

Links/Books/Movies Worth Noting:
Sometimes cleansing the temple means clearing out some emotional baggage as well. This film (link) won an award at the Cannes Film Festival for short (3 min) film… Enjoy

www.porcelainunicorn.com

This is the page/link where I pull the two quotes below and there were so
many, I decided to include the link here. Enjoy!
http://www.quotegarden.com/body.html

Quote for the Day:
“ To keep the body in good health is a duty… otherwise we shall not be able to keep our mind strong and clear. ” —Buddha

“Our bodies are our gardens – our wills are our gardeners.” —William Shakespeare

Photo of the Day:
The Earth (by extension) is also a temple, and although the entire planet is sacred, many places are considered the epitome of sacredness, including the Tetons. This group of the Tetons is known as the Cathedral Group. Enjoy.

Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D. is an internationally renowned expert in the fields of stress management, mind-body-spirit healing and stress and human spirituality. He is the author of over 12 books including the bestsellers, Stand Like Mountain, Flow Like Water, Stressed Is Desserts Spelled Backward, The Art of Calm, Quiet Mind, Fearless Heart, Managing Stress (7E) and his forthcoming book, A Beautiful World; The Earth Songs Journals. He can be reached through his website:www.brianlukeseaward.net

© Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D.

Dear Friends, Fans and Colleagues,
The renowned Kripalu Yoga Center in Lennox, MA has invited me to do a weekend retreat Oct 28-30th based on my bestselling book, Stand Like Mountain, Flow Like Water. If you have an interest is unplugging from your fast-paced lifestyle and finding your center of balance, come join us in the beautiful and relaxing Berkshires mountains this October. Kripalu has even secured some CE’s as well. The Earth Songs documentary film will be screened on Sat night, too. Below are two links with more contact information. Hope to see you in October.

Links Worth Noting:
http://www.kripalu.org/program/view/yogamed/RSHS-111/

http://www.kripalu.org/presenter/V0006748/brian_luke_seaward

Quote for the Day:
“Two roads diverged in a yellow wood, and sorry I could not travel both and be one traveler.” — Robert Frost

Photo for the Day:
A New England road less traveled, taken when I lived in Vermont many moons ago. Enjoy!

Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D. is an internationally renowned expert in the fields of stress management, mind-body-spirit healing and stress and human spirituality. He is the author of over 10 books including the bestsellers, Stand Like Mountain, Flow Like Water, Stressed Is Desserts Spelled Backward, The Art of Calm, Quiet Mind, Fearless Heart, Managing Stress (7E) and his forthcoming book, A Beautiful World; The Earth Songs Journals. He can be reached through his website:www.brianlukeseaward.net

© Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D.

While visiting a friend in Aspen a few weeks ago, the topic of diet came up over dinner. Have you heard of the book, The China Study, I was asked? The book explores the eating habits and health status of the Chinese and other Asians. The “take-home” message is that the typical Chinese diet is high in fiber (and low in animal protein), suggesting this is the reason why the Chinese have a lower rate of heart disease, cancer and diabetes when compared to Americans. The World Health Organization recommends between 50-60 grams of fiber per day. Note: The typical American consumes about 5-10 grams/day, if that. Processed foods, junk foods, comfort foods and fast foods typically don’t contain fiber. And as one of my guest speakers in my Nutrition, Health and Performance course would say, “There is not a whole lot of fiber in iceberg lettuce, gals.”
Why is fiber (also known as roughage) so important? Fiber (cellulose tissue that cannot be digested) acts like a broom that cleans out the gastro-intestinal tract. As such, it helps flush out cholesterol, and various other substances (and toxins) that might otherwise be absorbed into the bloodstream. Fiber, it is believed, is the first line of defense in regulating blood sugar levels. The Standard American Diet (SAD) is filled with empty calories (and little fiber). The goal of each meal is to eat nutrient-dense foods, lots of fruits and veggies and only a small portion of protein. While the premise of the book, The Chine Study, promotes veganism (not necessarily the intent here), the message here is that we all need to eat more fiber in our diets, regardless.

Stress Tip for the Day:
Foods high in fiber include fruits and veggies (broccoli, carrots, kale, cabbage, and many legumes (garbanzo beans, black beans, kidney beans, etc.) and whole grains (such as quinoa) etc.). By no coincidence, these same foods contain a host of vitamins and minerals necessary for optimal metabolism. So what’s for dinner tonight? Think fiber! Eat Fiber!

Links/Books/Movies Worth Noting:
Like every diet book, there are advocates and critics. Here are two links, one of each as well as the book title itself.

http://well.blogs.nytimes.com/2011/01/07/nutrition-advice-from-the-china-study/

http://www.cholesterol-and-health.com/China-Study.html

Campbell, C., The China Study: The Most Comprehensive Study of Nutrition Ever Conducted and the Startling Implications for Diet, Weight Loss and Long-Term Health. 2005.

Quote for the Day:
“Let food be your medicine and medicine be your foods.” — Hippocrates

Photo for the Day:
As part of a slide show I put together, called The Low Stress Diet, I went to Whole Foods one day and purchased a few bags of produce, including some cabbage for a photo-shoot. Afterward, I had one tremendous meal. Enjoy!

Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D. is an internationally renowned expert in the fields of stress management, mind-body-spirit healing and stress and human spirituality. He is the author of over 10 books including the bestsellers, Stand Like Mountain, Flow Like Water, Stressed Is Desserts Spelled Backward, The Art of Calm, Quiet Mind, Fearless Heart and Managing Stress (7E) as well as the forthcoming book, A Beautiful World. He can be reached through his website:www.brianlukeseaward.net

© Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D.

I watched with interest and curiosity as a friend became incredibly
worked-up over a software malfunction. In what could have been an easy solution soon became a series of frustrating tech support phone calls (lasting days), which only compounded his frustration no end. The expression, “Do you want to be right or do you want to be happy” came to mind several times. Creative problem solving is one of the most empowering techniques in stress management, because it enables the individual to stop spinning one’s wheels and move on. The biggest impediment to the creative process is the ego, which can either override any idea of merit, or play the “I’m right and I’ll prove it,” game. To get the most out of the creative solving process you have to step outside of the situation (also known as getting “outside the box”) to gain a sense of clarity of not only the problem, but all the possible solutions (and there is always more than one viable solution to a problem). The creative process involves several steps: (1. the search for ideas, 2, the incubation of ideas, 3) the selection of the best idea and 4) making the idea happen). The key is to do them in the right order.

Stress Tip for the Day:
Call to mind a problem that has been camped out on the landscape of your mind for a while, or perhaps has appeared recently. The first step in creative problem solving begins with identifying the problem. How would a child see the problem? How would a person from New Zealand or Australia or an alien see the problem? Once you have a good fix on the issue, come up with a least four viable options as well as one zany solution (zany ideas may not be viable, but they can open the door to new possibilities.) After surveying the list of ideas, select the best one and then put your game plan into action. Remember, there is no room for ego in the creative process. Whereas stress can be immobilizing, creativity is liberating….Be creative! Become empowered!

Links/Books/Movies Worth Noting:
My ultimate favorite book on creativity is Roger von Oech’s books, A Whack on the Side of the Head and A Kick in the Seat of the Pants. His Creative Whack Pack is now an App on the Apple store.

Quote for the Day:
“Every act of creation is first an act of destruction. ” —Pablo Picasso

Photo for the Day:
This photo is of a stained glass window located in the Blasket Island Museum on the Dingle Peninsula of Ireland, created to depict the story of the Blasket Islands visually. Enjoy!

Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D. is an internationally renowned expert in the fields of stress management, mind-body-spirit healing and stress and human spirituality. He is the author of over 12 books including the bestsellers, Stand Like Mountain, Flow Like Water, Stressed Is Desserts Spelled Backward, The Art of Calm, Quiet Mind, Fearless Heart and Managing Stress (7E) and his forthcoming, A Beautiful World. He can be reached through his website: www.brianlukeseaward.net

© Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D.

To honor the concept of healthy boundaries (and to enjoy the last few weeks of summer), this blog will take a vacation, returning after Labor Day. Thank you to all the readers who have been so kind with your positive feedback. There are many back issues to check out and revisit and I will have lots of new themes and topics (and photos) when Stressfully Speaking returns. See you in September!

Stress Tip for the Day:

Practice some healthy boundaries as well. Remember to take some time off for yourself.

Quote for the Day:

“Deep summer is when laziness finds respectability.” —Sam Keen

“In summer, the song sings itself.” –William Carlos Williams

Photo for the Day:

A humpback whale waves its tail before it descends into the deep blue waters of Tahiti. Enjoy!

Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D. is an internationally renowned expert in the fields of stress management, mind-body-spirit healing and stress and human spirituality. He is the author of over 10 books including the bestsellers, Stand Like Mountain, Flow Like Water, Stressed Is Desserts Spelled Backward, The Art of Calm, Quiet Mind, Fearless Heart and Managing Stress (7E). He can be reached through his website:www.brianlukeseaward.net

© Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D.

Researchers, in trying to find the source of staph infections in hospitals, think they might have the answer; your belly button. Most people, when taking a shower or bath, kind of gloss over the naval area. Few people, if anybody, scrubs the navel really good. As it turns out, the belly button plays host to a lot of germs and bacteria, including staph. WHO KNEW? While most of us may never go under the knife, it’s good to know these things if you do. No need complicating any surgical procedure with a staph infection, as many of these bugs are now resistant to our best drugs. An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure. Avoid one more kind of stress you never knew was out there…Clean your belly button!

Stress Tip for The Day:
While it might seem obvious to practice good hygiene with your belly button, the real stress tip for the day is this: Be sure to have a good patient advocate if you ever end up in the hospital. Hospital staff (particularly nurses, bless their hearts) are under a LOT of stress these days. Although it would be nice to think they can attend to every patient’s need, this isn’t always the case due to mounds of paperwork. A patient advocate (e.g. a close friend or relative) is someone who stays on top of things, like surgical procedures, (make sure they operate on the right body part), medications, and all the rest. Its disturbing to know that the 4th or 5th leading cause of death in the US is due to medical mistakes. So… start with cleaning your belly button, but don’t stop there.

Links/Books/Movies Worth Noting:
For those of you interested, here are a few links with more information on today’s topic:

http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2011/08/110803174757.htm

http://www.medicalnewstoday.com/releases/75042.php

http://www.medicalnewstoday.com/releases/41088.php

Quote for the Day:
“Hygiene is two thirds of health.” – Lebanese Proverb

“The only equipment lack in the modern hospital? Somebody to meet you at the entrance with a handshake!” ~Martin H. Fischer

Photo of the Day:
Cusco, Peru is referred to by natives as the “navel of the world.” It was only fitting, therefore to have today’s photo be an image of the heart of Cusco (mixed metaphors not withstanding). Enjoy!

Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D. is an internationally renowned expert in the fields of stress management, mind-body-spirit healing and stress and human spirituality. He is the author of over 10 books including the bestsellers, Stand Like Mountain, Flow Like Water, Stressed Is Desserts Spelled Backward, The Art of Calm, Quiet Mind, Fearless Heart and Managing Stress (7E). He can be reached through his website:www.brianlukeseaward.net

© Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D.

Please join us in Vail, Colorado this Columbus Day weekend at the world renowned Sonnenalp hotel Oct 7-9 for a glorious mountain getaway. This retreat offers some wonderful relaxation and guided mental imagey sessions, some thought-provoking, soul-searching exercises and of course, plenty of free to time to enjoy Vail Village. Special guests include singer/songwriter Dan Sebranek for a Saturday night concert (including an I set of Irish tunes). The Sonnenalp resort has offered an incredible rate of $120/night. Each room has a gas fireplace and heated bathroom floors, not to mention a wonderful spa. The ambiance of the Sonnenalp, not to mention Vail, Colorado, is nothing less than magical this time of year and it’s the perfect spot to regain your center of gravity, and come back to a place of inner peace in these turbulent times. For more information please go to the Upcoming Events page of www.brianlukeseaward.net and download the pdf brochure with all the information. Come home to the Colorado Rockies!

Stress Tip for the Day:
Consider joining us in Vail this October…. It’s just what your spirit needs!

Quote for the Day:
“Sometimes the cure for restlessness is rest.” —Colleen Wainwright

“He enjoys true leisure who has time to improve his soul’s estate.” —Henry David Thoreau.

Photo of the Day:
A view of the Rocky Mountains that promises to take your breath away. Enjoy

Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D. is an internationally renowned expert in the fields of stress management, mind-body-spirit healing and stress and human spirituality. He is the author of over 10 books including the bestsellers, Stand Like Mountain, Flow Like Water, Stressed Is Desserts Spelled Backward, The Art of Calm, Quiet Mind, Fearless Heart and Managing Stress (7E). He can be reached through his website:www.brianlukeseaward.net

© Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D.

If you pursue the question of spiritual well-being with any kind ofpassion, at some point you will come face to face with the concept of the “ascension process.” Ascension means many things to many people, but wisdom keepers speak of this as a significant advancement up the spiritual spiral; an elevation of consciousness, a significant soul-growth process. Implicit, for some, in the concept of ascension is a fall, as in the fall from grace. Though there are many interpretations of “the fall,” simply stated, the fall occurs every time the shadow of the ego eclipses the light of the soul. For some people this is a pretty deep decent into darkness. Conversely, the ascent is described by some as the ascension of divine energy up the spine (also known as the Kundalini Energy). As this energy rises, from the root chakra to the crown chakra, the cleansing process in each chrakra region can be emotionally painful (as one learns to release old thoughts, feelings, and perceptions that no longer serve one’s wellbeing). Carl Jung addressed the concept of the ascension process, tacitly, as the union of the conscious and unconscious minds, where the wisdom of the unconscious and collective (divine) consciousness rises up to a conscious level. As consciousness rises, we evolve spiritually, acting less from a motivation of fear and more from love. The ascension process is a shift (upward) from the darkness of fear toward the light of love and compassion. In many ways, this is a small step up through the “doors of perception,” yet for many with ego attachment, the abyss is nothing short of a quantum leap up.

Stress Tip for The Day:
Step outside your “guarded self” today and observe how often your thoughts and actions are fear-based. As you do this, take inventory on what expectations weren’t met. What aspect of your life didn’t seem in control? Take inventory of the ego’s shadow. Then assess how to release these thoughts, feelings and perceptions so you can move toward a motivation of love and compassion. There are many colors of love’s rainbow (e.g., patience, forgiveness, optimism, courage, tolerance, persistence, faith, humor, creativity and of course, compassion). Rather than taking one step forward and two back (and losing ground), take two steps forward, one toward the doors of a new perception and the second through the door… toward the light. Go ahead. Take the leap!

Links/Books/Movies Worth Noting:
If you were to Google the ascension process you would find everything from the sublime to the ridiculous. So consider starting with some books: A couple of great books to read of this ilk included the following: Man and his Symbols by Carl Jung And a new collection of essays on the topic of Kundalini, called Kundalini Rising published by Sounds True.

Quote for the Day:
“Modern man is sick because he is not whole.” — Carl G. Jung

Photo of the Day:
Rainbows often serve as a symbol of divine love. Colorado has been blessed with many rainbows this summer (lots of early morning and late afternoon showers with ample sunlight.) I have been blessed to capture them with my camera. Enjoy!

Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D. is an internationally renowned expert in the fields of stress management, mind-body-spirit healing and stress and human spirituality. He is the author of over 10 books including the bestsellers, Stand Like Mountain, Flow Like Water, Stressed Is Desserts Spelled Backward, The Art of Calm, Quiet Mind, Fearless Heart and Managing Stress (7E). He can be reached through his website:www.brianlukeseaward.net

© Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D.

These days, stress seems to affect everything, not the least of which are our oceans. A recent cover story on TIME magazine titled The Future of Fish was anything but reassuring. Our demand for fish is about to exceed the supply. Experts have been predicting for years that un-enforced limits on fishing would eventually begin to wipe out entire species of fish. That day is closing in on us. The problem is so severe that in Asia people are turning to Jelly fish as a source of food (oddly enough, jelly fish seem to thrive in warming ocean temps with more acidity). Some say that aquaculture (manmade fisheries) will be THE answer, but this is not without its own stressors. According to TIME magazine, since 1960 worldwide seafood consumption has increased 60%, leaving our oceans in short supply. 90% of Atlantic Salmon are not wild, rather they come from farms (these fish have to be given pellets to make their flesh pink). Some names of fish have been changed to make them more appealing (and were once thought to be garbage fish decades ago not worth eating) including Chilean Sea Bass (Patagonian Toothface fish—not even a bass) and Orange Roughy (slime face fish). Add to this mix the fact that many wild fish: Tuna, Swordfish and Salmon contain potentially toxic levels of mercury and PCB’s (toxins we then consume) and this is one fish story that no one boasts about.

Stress Tip for The Day:
By now you have heard of the benefits of eating cold (deep) water fish for their Omega 3 oils. It’s true. Eating fresh fish is quite good for you, but there are caveats. Before you buy your fish from the market, ask the person behind the counter where the fish comes from (farm or wild). If they plead ignorant, find someone who knows. Although more expensive, wild is always preferred over farm-raised fish, including shrimp. Also find out what day the fish comes to market and try to buy it on that day (usually Tuesdays and Saturdays). Rest assured that most restaurants serve “farm raised” salmon (remember, the best choice is wild salmon!) Make a habit to become educated about the health of our oceans and the fish that you eat from them. Finally, consider some new fish recipes to broadend your pallette: Here is a quick recipe: Marinate 2-4 servings of fresh Coho Salmon in Paul Newman’s Italian Dressing for 30 minutes. After preheating the oven, cover then cook the fish in the marinade for 20-30 mins (350 degrees) until done. Serve over a bed of fresh mashed potatoes (not from a box) or wild rice. Add a side of organic corn on the cob (organic butter) and fresh organic greens with raspberry vinegarette dressing. Yum!

Links/Books/Movies Worth Noting:
For starters, see if you can get your hands on, the read the TIME article (July 18th, 2011).
It’s not good news about the ocean fisheries, but here is some more information to understand the bigger picture:
http://news.nationalgeographic.com/news/2002/02/0225_0226_fishcrisis.html

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2006/11/02/AR2006110200913.html

Quote for the Day:
“In the hands of an able cook, fish can become an inexhaustible source of perpetual delight.” — J.B. Savarin

Photo of the Day:
Fresh catch of the day! Last summer while in on the island of Moorea (Tahiti) I saw various fishermen out at the end of the day with their catch. This guy was proud to pose with his fish. Fresh fish indeed! Enjoy!

Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D. is an internationally renowned expert in the fields of stress management, mind-body-spirit healing and stress and human spirituality. He is the author of over 10 books including the bestsellers, Stand Like Mountain, Flow Like Water, Stressed Is Desserts Spelled Backward, The Art of Calm, Quiet Mind, Fearless Heart and Managing Stress (7E). He can be reached through his website:www.brianlukeseaward.net

© Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D.

Today, we honor the dead and wounded of last week’s horrible and
senseless act of violence in Oslo, Norway. Please keep these people in
your heart with thoughts and prayers in this stressful time of grieving. Thank you. To my friends in Norway, I wish you peace.

Quote for the Day:
“Give sorrow words; the grief that does not speak whispers the o’er-fraught heart and bids it break.” —William Shakespeare

Photo of the Day:
Years ago I was invited to Norway on behalf of the US Olympic Biathlon team, as their sport psychologist. Norway is a beautiful country with the friendliest people on the planet. This photo of their flag was taken outside of Oslo.

Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D. is an internationally renowned expert in the fields of stress management, mind-body-spirit healing and stress and human spirituality. He is the author of over 10 books including the bestsellers, Stand Like Mountain, Flow Like Water, Stressed Is Desserts Spelled Backward, The Art of Calm, Quiet Mind, Fearless Heart and Managing Stress (7E). He can be reached through his website:www.brianlukeseaward.net

© Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D.

With all the problems in the world today, perhaps the popularity of superhero movies is to be expected. Harry Potter, Thor, X-Men… like millions of others, I went to the movie theater last weekend to see Captain America; A classic hero’s journey tale. The renowned mythologist, Joseph Campbell, stated that we gravitate toward these stories because we need to repeatedly hear the message: The hero must rise to the occasion and then return home! Like a map and compass, these stories provide we viewers (or readers) with the “tools” to get home safely. Each and everyone of us is on a hero’s journey. Rising to the occasion in real life means coping with stressors gracefully, not as a victim. Every superhero will face his or her nemesis. So will we: The boss from hell. A foreclosure. Alcoholism. The ex-spouse from hell, etc. To be honest, the list of stressors is nearly endless. Each hero is given two choices: Rise to the occasion and deal with things gracefully, or declare victimization. There really is no choice! Watching a movie about a self-declared victim is a weak, if not boring, plot line. Perhaps you know this story. It’s one thing to watch superhero movies. It’s quite another to “walk the talk” and become the hero of your own life. There is no time like the present. Campbell also gave this repeated warning. “Live your own life rather than trying to imitate someone’s story.” Be your authentic self. Be an authentic hero!

Stress Tip for The Day:
True to fashion of the hero’s journey, the hero gets some help along the way. Dorothy had the ruby red slippers. Frodo had Gandalf. Luke had Yoda and “the force”. You too, have what Joseph Campbell called “the assistance of spiritual aids:” what I call muscles of the soul (e.g., humor,
patience, forgiveness, optimism, compassion, to name a few). Like the superheros with bulging muscles, we too have muscles. We just have to use them. Yes, we can look at other’s lives and wish we could change places at times, but that’s not how the rules are played. We are THE hero in our own story/journey and we must accept this challenge, returning home with our arms held high in a victorious salute.

Links, Books and Movies Worth Noting:
By no coincidence, this weekend I was also sent a Youtube link for a new documentary about Joseph Campbell’s concept of The Hero’s Journey (see below). Enjoy! And if you haven’t seen the PBS special with Bill Moyers and Joseph Campbell, please do yourself a favor and reintroduce yourself to The Power of Myth. Oh, and by the way, I liked Captain America!

www.findingjoethemovie.com

Quote for the Day:
“We save the world by being alive ourselves.” —Joseph Campbell

Photo of the Day:
This photo was taken years ago at the Colorado Renaissance Festival, where children (of all ages) can work their imaginations to hone their skills on the hero’s journey. Enjoy!

Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D. is an internationally renowned expert in the fields of stress management, mind-body-spirit healing and stress and human spirituality. He is the author of over 10 books including the bestsellers, Stand Like Mountain, Flow Like Water, Stressed Is Desserts Spelled Backward, The Art of Calm, Quiet Mind, Fearless Heart and Managing Stress (7E). He can be reached through his website:www.brianlukeseaward.net

© Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D.

Freud was right about his concept of defense mechanisms! The sensitive ego has many strategies to minimize pain, not the least of which is to project one’s thoughts and feelings onto others; realizations that we find annoying about ourselves but would rather not admit. Interestingly, when people are caught “projecting negativity” they come back and say, “No, it’s just an observation!” Freud called that comment rationalization (another defense mechanism). Relationships provide an incredible mirror into our egos…if we let them. Finding fault with others, from noticing idiosyncrasies and irritating mannerisms to outright prejudice and racism offers insights into our own psyche, if we can truly be honest with ourselves. Interestingly, we tend to see these faults in others when we are ungrounded, less than centered and basically stressed. Do the images you see in your relationships offer a reflection of what’s really there, or a projection of what you have placed there? What lens do you choose to see the world through?

Stress Tip for the Day:
Stop and take another look at those you are involved with (e.g., friends, family co-workers, neighbors, etc.) Honestly ask yourself, what is it in that person that really bothers you and then ask yourself, how is it that you can identify this? The old adage, it takes one to know one may prevail. As noted many times before, meditation is one of the best ways to “domesticate the ego” and come back to that place of inner peace. Feeling grounded and centered one’s perspective tends to focus on the positive and the beauty in life. When the mind is calm, the mirror images offer the best reflection of what is really there, rather than a distortion of reality.

Links/Books/Movies Worth Noting:
It may have been a while since you took Psych 101, so perhaps a refresher is in order: Here are some links for more information on your biggest nemesis: The Ego.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Psychological_projection

http://changingminds.org/explanations/behaviors/coping/defense_mechanisms.htm

Quote for the Day:
“Vanity inclines us to find faults any where rather than in ourselves.” — Samuel Johnson

Photo for the Day:
While in Ireland on a photo expedition with a theme of Castles, I came across Kylemore Castle, now known as Kylemore Abby in County Mayo, Ireland. It was built by a man as a present for his wife, whom he adored. She only lived a few years after it was finished and over time it changed hands and is now a Benedictine monastery open to the public.

Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D. is an internationally renowned expert in the fields of stress management, mind-body-spirit healing and stress and human spirituality. He is the author of over 10 books including the bestsellers, Stand Like Mountain, Flow Like Water, Stressed Is Desserts Spelled Backward, The Art of Calm, Quiet Mind, Fearless Heart and Managing Stress (6E). He can be reached through his website:www.brianlukeseaward.net

© Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D.

Stress Tip for The Day:

Links/Books/Movies Worth Noting:
It’s not good news about the ocean fisheries, but here is some more information to understand the bigger picture
http://news.nationalgeographic.com/news/2002/02/0225_0226_fishcrisis.html
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2006/11/02/AR2006110200913.html

Quote for the Day:
“In the hands of an able cook, fish can become an inexhaustible source of perpetual delight.”— J.B. Savarin
Photo of the Day:
Fresh catch of the day! Last summer while in on the island of Moorea
(Tahiti) I saw various fishermen out at the end of the day with their
catch. Fresh fish indeed. Enjoy!

Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D. is
an internationally renowned expert in the fields of stress management,
mind-body-spirit healing and stress and human spirituality. He is the
author of over 10 books including the bestsellers, Stand Like Mountain,
Flow Like Water, Stressed Is Desserts Spelled Backward, The Art of
Calm, Quiet Mind, Fearless Heart and Managing Stress (6E). He can be
reached through his website:www.brianlukeseaward.net
© Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D.

I can recall Walter Cronkite telling his TV audience decades ago that technology, in the years to come, was going to simplify peoples lives to the extent that Americans would have oodles of leisure time. So emphatic was he that it was predicted Americans might even become fat and lazy with so much leisure time. Well, he was partially right. But what he and so many others didn’t factor into the technology equation was the human ego with an unending desire to be needed. That which was supposed to be our servant (providing information, and so many other conveniences for the rich life) has become the master and we are technology’s servants, or so it seems. Experts now have a name for the syndrome known as slavery to technology: “Screen addiction.” And it is everywhere… and causing much stress for a great many people. One of the greatest casualties of screen addictions is youngsters, when parents cannot break away from the internet or cell phone long enough to be present with their children.

Stress Tip for The Day:
Is technology your slave or master? Do you show signs and behaviors of a screen addiction? Do you take your lap top, cell phone, Ipod and Blackberry on vacation with you? Do you use more than one cell phone at a time? As the expression goes, technology is neither bad nor good; it all depends on our behavior with its use that makes it so. Take some time examine your boundaries with your technology. Do you even have healthy boundaries with the technology you use? Take this week to refine your technology habits by pulling in the reins and letting technology server you rather than having you give your power away to it and having it become your master. For starters, know it’s OK not to have your cell phone turned on all the time, nor feel the need to answer it, or check emails every five minutes of the day.

Quote for the Day:
“(Technology) is a new form of slavery, and distinguishable from the old simply by the fact that it is impersonal, that there is no human relationship between master and slave.” —Adapted from a quote of Leo Tolstoy

Photo of the Day:
While I could have placed a photo of someone addicted to their cell phone or blackberry, I chose to include a photo of an amazing sunrise this morning. Enjoy

Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D. is an internationally renowned expert in the fields of stress management, mind-body-spirit healing and stress and human spirituality. He is the author of over 10 books including the bestsellers, Stand Like Mountain, Flow Like Water, Stressed Is Desserts Spelled Backward, The Art of Calm, Quiet Mind, Fearless Heart and Managing Stress (6E). He can be reached through his website:www.brianlukeseaward.net

© Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D.

If you were asked to use one word or term to define yourself, you may give a look of frustration. Most of us would say this nearly impossible to do (e.g., father, artist, husband, brother, author, environmentalist, etc.). Yet as hard as this may seem, many people actually do define themselves with labels based on one defining moment in their lives: Rape victim. Cancer Survivor. Recovering Alcoholic. Refugee. Divorcee. Co-dependent. Labels may be helpful at the start of a situation but in time, they can become a gilded cage of sorts. Soon not only do we invest all of your energy into this identity or label, but others soon label us this way as well, making it hard to realize our full potential. Defining moments certainly help build character, if we allow them to do so.

Stress Tip for the Day:
How would you define yourself? Can you do it in one word or phrase? It this word or phrase an adjective or noun? Do you limit yourself to one word or phrase? Is there a label you use to define yourself? These are important questions to ask (and keep asking yourself) as you navigate the human journey. Labels can either be the gas pedal or brakes in how you drive your life. Do the labels you give yourself enhance your human potential, or detract from it. If you don’t like (or more likely, have outgrown the label you use, you can always create another. Pick something that will enhance your potential. Write it down on a sticky note and post it where you can see it, with the promise that as if becomes as is.

Links/Books/ Movies Worth Noting:
If you think you might like to read more about the concept of defining moments, here is a link by psychotherapist, Mel Schwartz… enjoy

http://www.melschwartz.com/DefiningMoments.html

Quote for the Day:
“Once a victim, twice a volunteer.” — Anonymous

Photo for the Day: I am back in Ireland at the present moment doing a photo expedition and scouting out some new places for a possible tour next year. This photo was taken at a stately manor (the Adare Manor) in Adare, Ireland and although it has nothing to do with today’s blog, the artwork on this castle wall is nothing less than amazing. Enjoy!

Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D. is an internationally renowned expert in the fields of stress management, mind-body-spirit healing and stress and human spirituality. He is the author of over 10 books including the bestsellers, Stand Like Mountain, Flow Like Water, Stressed Is Desserts Spelled Backward, The Art of Calm, Quiet Mind, Fearless Heart and Managing Stress (6E). He can be reached through his website:www.brianlukeseaward.net

© Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D.

Free will or fate? This question rivals the “nature or nurture” argument regarding how much control do we actually have in our lives. With free will, we have all the control, and all the blame. With fate, we can claim no control, yet none of the responsibility. Perhaps the answer regarding free will or destiny is we share a little of both. As someone once explained it to me, the bus is scheduled to come down the street and stop. Whether you choose to hop on is entirely up to you. Regardless of the free will vs. destiny question, the issue of trust arises; trust in ourselves, or trust in something bigger than ourselves; more likely trust in both. A common phrase I hear among friends and colleagues (and one I use myself) is this: Trust the Universe! In essence, it’s a team effort (like an orchestra, and yes,,metaphorically speaking, there is a conductor who keeps tempo). Using the orchestra metaphor, it is up to us to tune our instruments, practice our skills, and keep up with everyone else on the team. Even those who play solos still play in tune with the rest of the orchestra. Trusting the universe also means knowing when to play the solo and when to be still. Being still is “code” for letting go, releasing, or detaching from the outcome of how you think things are supposed to be. Trusting the Universe (God) means having faith that, in the end, it will all work out as it should. In hindsight, we often recognize this wisdom.

Stress Tip for the Day:
Control issues (also known as control dramas) make up a large percentage of chronic stressors. How much trust do you place in yourself on your own human journey? Are you in alignment with the Universe or do you fight it? Take some time to do some soul searching on this issue. Learn to find that delicate balance between honoring yourself (and what it takes to get things done with your effort) and honoring that which is beyond you but very much a part of you. Links/Books/Movies Worth Noting:

Quote for the Day:
“When I’m trusting and being myself as fully as possible, everything in my life reflects this by falling into place easily, often miraculously.” — Anonymous

Photo for the Day:
Rainbows are often a symbol of trust. Yesterday we had several rainbows throughout the day and although I didn’t have my camera with me (big mistake!), and as the expression goes, no rain, no rainbows.” This rainbow photo was taken in Kauai…Enjoy!

Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D. is an internationally renowned expert in the fields of stress management, mind-body-spirit healing and stress and human spirituality. He is the author of over 10 books including the bestsellers, Stand Like Mountain, Flow Like Water, Stressed Is Desserts Spelled Backward, The Art of Calm, Quiet Mind, Fearless Heart and Managing Stress (6E). He can be reached through his website:www.brianlukeseaward.net

© Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D.

The first thing you notice when you walk into a European Market is how fresh the food is. Food items aren’t wrapped in plastic or tucked away in cardboard boxes behind frosted glass freezers. Olives float in fresh olive oil contained in aged wooden barrels. Huge blocks of cheese temp the eyes and nose. Fresh baked breads are stacked in piles high and the aroma awakens the senses. Veggies begged to be picked up and practically fondled. Europe has tried very hard to stop genetically modified foods into their boarders. Dairy products cannot have traces of antibiotics, hormones or petrochemical fertilizers. The foods just look fresher as you walk by each stall in the market, and for good reason, IT IS! There has been much talk about why Europeans, particularly those who live around the Mediterranean Sea, by and large, are healthy (and more so than Americans). Is it the foods they eat (fresh olives and olive oil in their cooking), red wines (bioflavinoids), fresh meats, or the abundance of fresh herbs (antioxidants) used in food preparation? Or is it the lifestyle (walking rather than driving everywhere), sitting down to a delicious meal and talking with friends and family rather than eating in front of the television (with all it’s food commercials enticing you to eat more?) The Mediterranean Diet is not so much about food, as it is a way of life.

Stress Tip for the Day:
How is the quality of your life? Do you wander through the market (other than a farmer’s market, Whole Foods is the closest thing most people will see to a Mediterranean Market display of food) letting your sense of smell influence your food selection? Are evening meals a celebration of life, or an errand to rush through? Is food preparation an art form or just something to microwave? Do you take evening strolls through your neighborhood to visit with neighbors or stay sequestered in your house after work each day? Do you take time to watch the sunsets and smell the flowers and herbs at dusk (the best time)? If you’re looking to improve the quality of your life, start with the freshness of the food you eat, but don’t stop there.

Links/Books/Movies Worth Noting:
Here are a few links with more information about THE diet:

http://www.mediterranean-food-recipes.com/
http://www.oldwayspt.org/mediterraneandiet

Quote for the Day:
“If more of us valued food and cheer and song above hoarded gold, it would be a merrier world.”– J.R.R. Tolkien

Photo for the Day:
One of ourfirst stops in Ireland was at the English Food Market in Cork. This photo, of the olive stand, was nothing less than mouth-watering (and the free samples were excellent).

Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D. is an internationally renowned expert in the fields of stress management, mind-body-spirit healing and stress and human spirituality. He is the author of over 10 books including the bestsellers, Stand Like Mountain, Flow Like Water, Stressed Is Desserts Spelled Backward, The Art of Calm, Quiet Mind, Fearless Heart and Managing Stress (6E). He can be reached through his website:www.brianlukeseaward.net

© Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D.

Due to a heavy travel schedule this month (the Humor & Creativity conference in NY, the Unity Church Conference in Kansas City and the Spirit of Ireland Journey on the Emerald Isle) I have elected to put this blog on hiatus till I get home on June 30. I invite everyone to check out some back issues of Stressfully Speaking and I promise to have several new themes (and photographs) upon my return.

Dear Blog fans… I am having many problems (but no stress) with posting the blog today and I don’t know how to fix things… so below is what I was able to salvage…my apologies.

• Stress Tip For The Day:

Are there good addictions? Some people see exercise as being a good addiction, but there are others who say that addictions of any kind are an attempt, consciously, more likely unconsciously, of avoidance. Still others suggest that addictions of any kind are an attempt to fill a spiritual vacuum. Regarding addictions, there is no separation between mind, body, spirit and emotions. Today it’s time to take an honest look at yourself and your behaviors (all of them). If you are not sure about any potential addictions, try doing “without” for a few days and see where truth lies. If you are still not sure, ask a close friend. Often what we fail to see in ourselves is quite obvious to others. Finally, as the saying goes, everything is moderation.

• Links/Books Worth Noting:

The topic of addictions is vast and no blog can begin to address it. But there are lots of books, links and resources of interest.. Below are a
few:

When Society Becomes and Addict, Anne Wilson Schaef

Codependent No More, Melodie Beattie

http://addictionrecoverybasics.com/

• Quote for the Day:

“Every form of addiction is bad, no matter whether it be a narcotic, alcohol, morphine or idealism.”— Carl G. Jung

• Photo of the Day:

Today’s photo is a beach scene on the island of Kauai. Enjoy!

Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D.
is an internationally renowned expert in the fields of stress
management, mind-body-spirit healing and stress and human spirituality.
He is the author of over 10 books including the bestsellers, Stand
Like Mountain, Flow Like Water, Stressed Is Desserts Spelled Backward,
The Art of Calm, Quiet Mind, Fearless Heart and Managing Stress (6E). He can be reached through his website:www.brianlukeseaward.net

© Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D.

Several years ago I taught a graduate course called behavioral medicine where we focused a fair amount of attention on the addiction process. As it turns out, there are two kinds of addictions: Chemical addictions (such as drugs and alcohol) and process addictions, including gambling, eating, sex, money and shopping, even people (this is called co-dependency). One book I often quoted from that time from was by Anne Wilson Schaef. The book was called When Society Becomes and Addict. Her premise was that addiction is an inherent part of the human condition—tied directly to the ego’s need to be satisfied. Where there is ego/control issues, there is stress. According to her (and others) we are all addicts of some kind. For several years television watching was the number addiction, and of course alcoholism. Experts suggest today that addictions to technology tops the list (e.g. cell phones, internet, etc.). The term today is “screen addictions, ” and the problem is rampant. Regardless of the addictive behavior, it becomes problematic; stressful to everyone near and far, when there is denial about the addiction and refusal to get help. Addictions are some of our biggest health problems today and where there is an addiction, there is stress.

• Stress Tip For The Day:

Are there good addictions? Some people see exercise as being a good addiction, but there are others who say that addictions of any kind are an attempt, consciously, more likely unconsciously, of avoidance. Still others suggest that addictions of any kind are an attempt to fill a spiritual vacuum. Regarding addictions, there is no separation between mind, body, spirit and emotions. Today it’s time to take an honest look at yourself and your behaviors (all of them). If you are not sure about any potential addictions, try doing “without” for a few days and see where truth lies. If you are still not sure, ask a close friend. Often what we fail to see in ourselves is quite obvious to others. Finally, as the saying goes, everything is moderation.

• Links/Books Worth Noting:

The topic of addictions is vast and no blog can begin to address it. But there are lots of books, links and resources of interest.. Below are a few:

When Society Becomes and Addict, Anne Wilson Schaef

Codependent No More, Melodie Beattie

http://addictionrecoverybasics.com/

• Quote for the Day:

“Every form of addiction is bad, no matter whether it be a narcotic, alcohol, morphine or idealism.”

— Carl G. Jung

• Photo of the Day:

Today’s photo is a beach scene on the island of Kauai. Enjoy!

Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D. is an internationally renowned expert in the fields of stress management, mind-body-spirit healing and stress and human spirituality. He is the author of over 10 books including the bestsellers, Stand Like Mountain, Flow Like Water, Stressed Is Desserts Spelled Backward, The Art of Calm, Quiet Mind, Fearless Heart and Managing Stress (6E). He can be reached through his website:www.brianlukeseaward.net

© Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D.

It’s fear that causes us to lie. Simply stated, the ego feels insecure about the course of our actions (often motivated by fear). So… to avoid embarrassment, we bend the truth, tell a white lie, or in some cases a whopper! Lies may see like a way to avoid the pain of embarrassment, but it doesn’t take long to see the foundations of trust, either in a friendship or working relationship crumble, then disintegrate! Once trust is violated, it’s hard to ever get that back. Ironically, it’s
stress that can cause one to lie, and it is stress that becomes compounded when one perpetuates the lie(s). The weight of a lie can be a heavy burden. Living with the incongruency of a falsehood tears at the heart. This, in turn, affects (taints) all other behavior. Many people have made the news with their whopper lies including Martha Stewart, Barry Bonds, Arnold Schwarzenegger. Things are not looking good for Lance Armstrong, either. But are we any different, really?
Taking the high road means to walk the path of integrity, domesticating the ego to be our bodyguard, not the CEO of our lives. Telling the truth is the noble course of action.

• Stress Tip For The Day:
Make a habit to observe your thoughts today (and every day). When you catch a fear-based lie passing through your lips (preferably before), stop, ponder and explain your fear then correct your communication and ask for forgiveness. Making peace with yourself at the earliest possible moment is one of the surest ways to return to inner peace.

• Links/Books Worth Noting:
I would like to recommend a really good book on forgiveness. It’s by Fred Luskin (who does research on forgiveness out of Stanford University), and it’s called Forgive for Good.

• Quote for the Day:
“Tell the truth… it’s easier to remember!” — Mark Twain

• Photo of the Day:
It will be quite sad if we learn that Lance Armstrong fell under the spell of fear in an effort to win the Tour de France. Time will tell and I wish him well. This photo was taken in Colorado at one of our many cycling races. Enjoy!

Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D. is an internationally renowned expert in the fields of stress management, mind-body-spirit healing and stress and human spirituality. He is the author of over 10 books including the bestsellers, Stand Like Mountain, Flow Like Water, Stressed Is Desserts Spelled Backward, The Art of Calm, Quiet Mind, Fearless Heart and Managing Stress (6E). He can be reached through his website:www.brianlukeseaward.net

© Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D.

One of the tenants of psychology is the concept called the Yerkes-Dodson Law or curve. With performance on the bottom and arousal on the left, the graph showed that arousal can and will increase performance to a point (and this point differs from person to person). Then performance decreases, sometimes dramatically. Arousal is another word for stress. It’s also another word for sensory stimulation. Similarly, performance can also be described as health. So another interpretation of the Yerkes-Dodson curve suggests that to a point, stress (sensory stimulation) is good, but past that point, all hell breaks loose. I first heard of this in my work with Olympic athletes, but the concept applies to anyone.

We are living is times of sensory bombardment. While many people call this the “information age,” others have nicked-named it the “marketing age,” where not blank space, real, cyber or otherwise, is left blank. Bits and bytes of information are flying everywhere. Signs of information overload include a shortened attention span, irritability, poor memory, even poor reaction time. Because there is no separation between mind and body, when these conditions persist, the next sign is burnout, followed by some aspect of health that becomes compromised. The key in psychological terms is this: Know your threshold and don’t go beyond it.

• Stress Tip For The Day:
What is your threshold for sensory stimulation? People under the age of 20 seem to have an unquenchable thirst for sensory stimulation. Conversely, the elderly do best when they stick to a routine, perhaps minimizing/filtering what comes in . Experts in the field of brain physiology with an eye on Alzheimer’s suggest that the brain needs new stimulation (e.g., a new language, Sudoku, cross word puzzles, etc.) Experts in the field of stress management remind us of the importance of meditation as a means to stabilize, if not master, this threshold of excitement. Balance is the key. Knowing your excitement threshold is like knowing your checking account balance. What is your threshold for sensory stimulation? What do you do to master it? If you don’t have a practice of meditation, it is never too late to get started with it.

• Links/Books Worth Noting:
If you haven’t read the Newsweek article on Information Overstimulation, here is the link:
http://www.newsweek.com/2011/02/27/i-can-t-think.html

• Quote for the Day:
“I finally get meditation. It’s like deleting old emails.” — 8th grader at Sunset Middle School, Longmont, CO.

• Photo of the Day:
Today’s photo isn’t a photo at all. It’s a cartoon I had created for my textbook. Enjoy!

Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D. is an internationally renowned expert in the fields of stress management, mind-body-spirit healing and stress and human spirituality. He is the author of over 10 books including the bestsellers, Stand Like Mountain, Flow Like Water, Stressed Is Desserts Spelled Backward, The Art of Calm, Quiet Mind, Fearless Heart and Managing Stress (6E). He can be reached through his website:www.brianlukeseaward.net

© Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D.

Have you ever dreamed of basking under the rays of the Tuscan sun (if you have seen the movie staring Diane Lane, then the answer is YES!) Well…our trip to Ireland last year was so successful that I was asked (many times over) to put together a similar type trip to Tuscany this year. I found one of the best tour companies for small groups like ours and the dates are set: Sept 23-Oct 1^st. We begin in Florence for two nights, then drive to the Tuscany countryside for four nights and end our trip on the Mediterranean Sea near the UNESCO villages of Cinque Terra. It will be a most memorable trip. We have several spots left and would LOVE to have you join us: Great food, awesome sights, and great like-minded people who wish to recalibrate their lifestyles toward optimal health and wellness with great food, morning meditations and some light lectures on various aspects of health and wellbeing (we even have 10 CE’s through the American Holistic Nurses Association. A link below has all the information. So…start packing your bags…

Stress Tip for the Day: Please consider joining us for a most memorable trip to Tuscany, Italy this fall. $3,600 (land package). Call or email for more details.

Links, Books & Movies Worth Noting: This link has all the information you need for our trip:

http://www.brianlukeseaward.net/tuscany.html

Quote for the Day: “We were given: Two hands to hold. Two legs to walk. Two eyes to see. Two ears to listen. But why only one heart? Because the other was given to someone else. For us to find.” —Anonymous

Photo for the Day: A photo of the unique, memorable Tuscan countryside.

Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D. is an internationally renowned expert in the fields of stress management, mind-body-spirit healing and stress and human spirituality. He is the author of over 10 books including the bestsellers, Stand Like Mountain, Flow Like Water, Stressed Is Desserts Spelled Backward, The Art of Calm, Quiet Mind, Fearless Heart and Managing Stress (6E). He can be reached through his website:www.brianlukeseaward.net

© Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D.

Having just returned from Lansing, Michigan where I was invited to make a presentation at Michigan State University on the topic on The Call to Leadership, I felt inspired to share some insights from this presentation. The study of leadership is a study of the psychology of leadership; those qualities and aspects of personality that galvanize the human spirit to new heights of potential. There are some who say we are living in times of a crisis of leadership in all aspects of society. In such times people tend to look back in history and try to identify the best examples of leadership. Examples might include Nelson Mandela, Lewis and Clark, and one of my favorites, Ernest Shakleton. In this search for leadership, people also try to identify what are the best qualities of dynamic leadership including, but not limited to integrity, courage, honesty, inspiration, vision, and humility. The pitfalls of leadership are also examined and there tends to be no short list of qualities that are noticed. No matter how many shortcomings are listed, it is fair to say that they begin with stress in the form of arrogance coupled with fear” Simple stated, stress makes for bad leadership. Servant leadership is a term you might start listening for these days; a leader who works directly with people as opposed to remaining perched on the top. Leading from behind is also an expression you might hear more of. It speaks of unity building, consensus building and bringing people together rather than ruling by decree. Nelson Mandela referred to the bloodless transition out of Apartheid as leading from behind.

Stress Tip for the Day: How would you rate your leadership skills? Luminaries in many fields remind us that each of us is a leader, and at this time, this chapter of humanity, each of us needs to step up to the plate and demonstrate the epitome of dynamic leadership. This includes, but is not limited to, parenting skills, neighborhood meetings, environmental behaviors, driving, you name it.

Links, Books & Movies Worth Noting Many books have been written on the topic of leadership, but perhaps some of the best book are those autobiographies from those who have lead by example. For this reason I would like to recommend the following books:

South by Sir Ernest Shackleton

Reason for Hope by Jane Goodall

Long Walk to Freedom by Nelson Mandela

Quote for the Day: Normally I only have one quote, but this topic has no shortage of quotes from people who have been there: Enjoy!

“A leader should have an ability to see beyond the present problem”— Norman Vincent Peale

“Innovation distinguishes between a leader and a follower.” ~Steve Jobs

“In matters of style, swim with the current. In matters of principle, stand like a rock.” —Thomas. Jefferson

“The only real training for leadership is leadership.” —Antony Jay

“Example is not the main thing in influencing others, it is the only thing.”—Albert Schweitzer

“Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man’s character, give him power.” —Abraham Lincoln

“Leadership and learning are indispensable to each other.” –John Fitzgerald Kennedy

“The manager asks how and when; the leader asks what and why.” —Warren Bennis

Photo for the Day: A photo of several Canada geese (these guys take turns leading). Enjoy!

Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D. is an internationally renowned expert in the fields of stress management, mind-body-spirit healing and stress and human spirituality. He is the author of over 10 books including the bestsellers, Stand Like Mountain, Flow Like Water, Stressed Is Desserts Spelled Backward, The Art of Calm, Quiet Mind, Fearless Heart and Managing Stress (6E). He can be reached through his website:www.brianlukeseaward.net

© Brian Luke Seaward, Ph.D.

When I was a little boy, my mother used to read me and my sister
stories from a big illustrated book of the Brothers Grimm. One of the
stories (and illustrations) I recall vividly involved a story of two
sisters. The younger sister was extremely kind. Her kindness was
surpassed only by her physical beauty. Her elder sister was equally
pretty, but extremely jealous, which she voiced in harsh words and
vicious comments. One day, while their parents were away, the two
sisters were home alone when an old woman with a sack of clothes came by the house in desperate need of water. The elder sister uttered nasty words refusing to help her. Upon hearing this, the younger sister ran to her aid and attended to all her needs. When fully rested, the elderly traveler said to the young women, I have gifts for you both. To the kind sister, she said, “Whenever you speak words of kindness, diamond, pearls and gems shall fall from your lips. Your kindness shall never be forgotten.” As the pretty young woman offered words of thanks, two precious diamonds and a sparkling ruby fell from her mouth into her hands. Upon seeing this, the elder sister demanded to know what the old woman would give her. “Every time you speak ugly words, snakes and frogs shall crawl out of your mouth.” The elder sister yelled, “Get out you old, miserable hag.” As she uttered these words, just as the traveled had foretold, two snakes slithered out of her mouth and
dropped to the floor, rapping themselves around her ankles. In case you missed the moral to this story, let me state the obvious: Choose your words wisely. It is easy to speak kind words when you are feeling happy. It is far more difficult to be diplomatic in times of stress, which is all the more reason to do so, if for no other reason, so there is less mess to clean up afterward. As my mother used to say, “I wish you many diamonds today and every day.”